Long distance relationships in college

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Long distance relationships are seemingly the ultimate nightmare. I know that many of the individuals I have spoken with throughout the years have frequently commented that this kind of relationship is doomed to fail. I was always insistent that I would never partake in a long distance relationship, as I also found the whole idea unthinkable and honestly, ignorant. How could two people expect to stay close when they are so far away? I have simply lost touch with many friends that I have cared deeply about due to the miles between us. It only seemed plausible to assume the same thing would happen with any boy I dated.

Yet, here I find myself, a senior in college, doing exactly what I said I wouldn’t. I am dating a boy that lives five hours away from me. It was not something that I really questioned when I first returned this semester. Then, it hit me. Did I not promise myself I would never do this very thing? As the semester is underway, you may be wondering if you can handle this kind of relationship for yourself. While I once questioned the logistics of such a set up, I now see that it truly depends on the partners in the relationship and the time they are willing to put into it.

In my opinion, the most important concept to making this work for you is communication. I am quite sure that you have all heard this advice many times over. Yet, the key to many successful relationships, romantic or not, is to communicate effectively and often. This becomes more vital as you are far away from your significant other. If both of you are truly committed to the relationship, then you can make the effort to stay up to date on each other’s lives. This is not saying that you need to call your boyfriend or girlfriend with each play-by-play moment of your day, but certainly a phone call at the end of each day is warranted. Texting throughout the day is also useful. Both of you need to reciprocate and show how much you still care to be involved in that other person’s life.

Personally, one avenue I have been able to take advantage of is letter writing. It seems that no one in our generation is quite keen on writing letters and notes to others when we have technology to assist us. Yet, there is nothing like a receiving a handwritten letter from someone that you deeply care about. I have really enjoyed using this method to organize my thoughts down on paper and try to say the things I have really wished to convey.

Also, if it is feasible, you should make visits to one another. I know this may not work for everyone. Yet, as many of us are from the Northern Virginia or D.C. area, your significant other is very likely to be from that area if they are not here in Radford. Personally, I am the one who is away from home while my boyfriend is still up in Maryland. I vowed to myself to never be “that girl” that goes home every weekend to make visits to her boyfriend. That is not ultimately what is best for me or for him because then we both may miss out on many weekend activities to be with one another consistently. I would have to put my friends and lacrosse games at Radford on hold to make trips home. Although, going home once or twice a semester, giving you the chance to both see your family and significant other, is a great plan. Even more so, it is nice if you can get your partner to come and visit you. This way, as in my case, they can meet your college friends, see where you live, and so on. This can really help to keep that person included in your life.

In the end, it’s all about if you are truly willing to make the relationship work. You may miss that person each and every day, as I know I do, but the distance is certainly worth it for a special guy or gal.